forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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