I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
