Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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