I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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