So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
