guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
then he tried to convert me to islam
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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