My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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