Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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