their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
