I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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