Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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