Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
