dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
