oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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