I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
