my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
