I hate your face
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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