Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Randomize
