just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
