guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
