I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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