The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
