He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
YAS. BRING CRAB.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Randomize
