Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
