bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
