Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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