Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
