I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Randomize
