how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
