Buhtt sex?
thus making me awesome and them whores
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
