so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
