he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
