Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Randomize
