No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
