me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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