therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
