Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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