we made out on top of his cat.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Randomize
