I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
