is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
