Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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