He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
