Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
