I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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