the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
