It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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