There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
