he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
if i died would you start the facebook group?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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