we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
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