I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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